Friday, July 31, 2009

before the needle drops, they're gonna know your name.

1. Where were you 3 hours ago?
I was having dinner 3 hours ago.

2. Who are you in love with?
Syafique ; the heart taker.

3. Have you ever eaten a crayon?
Yes, maybe 15 years ago.

4. Is there anything pink within 10 feet of you?
My pyjama, my comb.

5. When is the last time you went to the mall?
Last weenkend.

6. Are you wearing socks right now?
No, I'm not. It would be effingly weird.

7. Do you have a car worth over $2,000?
Hah. I wish.

8. When was the last time you drove out of town?
I never drive, to start with.

9. Have you been to the movies in the last 5 days?
Sadly no.

10. Are you hot?
Whatthefuck? No, I'm not.

11. What was the last thing you had to drink?

12. What are you wearing right now?

13. Do you wash your car or let the car wash do it?
I ain't got no car honey.

14. Last food that you ate?
Nasi ayam. ;9

15. Where were you last week at this time?
Same spot, perhaps?

16. Have you bought any clothing items in the last week?
Crushingly, no.

17. When is the last time you ran?
I literally ran away from Syafique on Wednesday. Does that count? ;P

18. What's the last sporting event you watched?
I don't fancy sports.

19. What is your favorite animal?
Hamsters are the cuddliest but I own Koi fish.

20. Your dream vacation?

21. Last person's house you were in?
Pak Lang's.

22. Worst injury you've ever had?
Mental disorder. Hah.

23. Have you been in love?
Who haven't?

24. Do you miss anyone right now?
I miss "teddy bear" dearly.

25. Last play you saw?
I might say, I don't fancy plays.

26. What is your secret weapon to lure in the opposite sex?
Whatthefuck? No secret weapon. I happen to be myself. ;)

27. What are your plans for tonight?
Texting Syafique at the moment.

28. Who is the last person you sent a MySpace message or comment?

29. Next trip you are going to take?
I have no idea.

30. Ever go to camp?
I'm not into camps. Eek.

31. Were you an honor roll student in school?
Hell no.

32. What do you want to know about the future?

33. Are you wearing any perfume or cologne?

34. Are you due sometime this year for a doctor's visit?
Not that I'm aware of.

35. Where is your best friend?
In my heart. *Eceh.

36. How is your best friend?
I hope she's alright.

37. Do you have a tan?

38. What are you listening to right now?
New Classic - Drew Seeley and Selena Gomez.

39. Do you collect anything?
Experience in life. ;P

40. Who is the biggest gossiper you know?
Woah. I'm not bringing up any names, just in case.

41. Last time you got stopped by a cop or pulled over?

42. Have you ever drank your soda from a straw?
Soda always comes with straws.

43. What does your last text message say?
"Baby~ awk ja0h meyh,how?:p..da 0rg xm0 pegi,huhu~...adesh...skrg da ta ske dnnr,lalala"

44. Do you like hot sauce?
More or less.

45. Last time you took a shower?
2 hours ago.

46. Do you need to do laundry?
Not right now, no.

47. What is your heritage?
Errr. No idea?

48. Are you someone's best friend?
I believe so.

49. Are you rich?
I am rich with smiles. ;)

50. What were you doing at 12AM last night?
I was on the phone with my heart taker. ;D

you say aku.

You say aku seperti Barbie
You look so pretty menarik hati
You say aku layaknya peri
Tebarkan cinta di atas Bumi

Baby please.. please..
Don’t play on me
Baby please.. please..
Love me, love me

Baby baby my baby
You drive me crazy
Baby baby my baby
My heart is beating honey
Baby baby my baby
Oh please say you love me
Baby baby my baby

You say aku seperti puteri
Yang kau cari selama ini

Baby please.. please..
Don’t play on me
Baby please.. please..
Love me, love me

Baby baby my baby
You drive me crazy
Baby baby my baby
My heart is beating honey
Baby baby my baby
Oh please say you love me
Baby baby my baby

Baby please.. please..
Don’t play on me
Baby please.. please..
Love me, love me

Baby baby my baby
You drive me crazy
Baby baby my baby
My heart is beating honey
Baby baby my baby
Oh please say you love me
Baby baby my baby

Baby baby my baby
You drive me crazy
Baby baby my baby
My heart is beating honey
Baby baby my baby
Oh please say you love me
Baby baby my baby

Singer : Cinta Laura.
Title : You Say Aku.
Album : OST Upik, Abu dan Laura.

Wednesday, July 29, 2009

does this mean i have to hold on to the hopes i keep within my reach ?

Tuesday, July 28, 2009

and i wish that i didn't need you so bad.

This is what happen when I am left alone while everyone is upstairs, snoring deep into their fantasy dreams. My mind starts to ramble with all the unwanted facts. Making me scared up to my veins. *Shivers.

This is so typical me. I'm paranoid. I'm scared. I can't help myself but to think of the possibilities of losing him though conceptually, he's not even mine. Last night's conversation kept on rewinding itself in my head over and over again even when I shut the darn TV off. (What the hell? So out of topic...) Normally, it won't even budge my shiver nerve cells but after last night, I could not sleep well. I kept on dreaming - bad dreams. Sheesh. This is so hard to put in words. I can't even type what I want to say. Bigger problems in making me say it with my own voice. Its indescribable.

What if she steals your heart back and leave me with minor chances?

PS : I'm rambling? No idea.

a warm hug is all we need.


what am i gonna do when i get a little excited in vain?

This is what happened when I am SUPER bored. ;D Hope you don't mind.

click it, for larger view.

safinah's .

Wedding Plans.

1. How old are you?

2. Are you single?
Conceptually single. According to my heart, I'm his princess. ;)

3. At what age do you think you'll get married?
24-25 years old perhaps?

4. Do you think you'll marry the person you are with now?
We'll see.

5. If not, who do you want to marry?
If I will not marry the person I am with now, I want to be married to Fabio DaSilva.

6. Who will be you bridesmaid and best man?
Aza will be my bridesmaid. As for the best man, the groom will decide.

7. Do you want a garden/beach or traditional wedding?
A beach wedding.

8. Where do you plan to go on your honeymoon?
Anywhere beachy.

9. How many guests do you think you'll invite?
Families and close friends will be more than enough.

10. Will that include your exes?
Sorry. Not invited.

11. How many layers of cake do you want?

12. When you you want to get married, morning or evening?

13. Name the song/tune you'd like to play at your wedding.
I'm not telling.

14. Do you prefer fine dining or just normal spoon & fork?
Fine dining at the beach? Sound perfect. ;P

15. Champagne or red wine?
Orange juice.

16. Honeymoon right after the wedding or days after the wedding?
That very night! LOL. Days after the wedding, of course.

17. Money or household items?

18. How many kids would you like to have?

19. Will you record your honeymoon in DVD/CD?

20. Whose wedding plans would you like to know next?
Anyone will do.

meet me halfway, right at the boarderline.

*Updated 31st July.

That's a looooong gap since I last blogged here. Sorry for that. I have been a very busy young lady and now I am very "free". Sheesh. That is so unlikely. Mid semester breaks for UiTM had been brought forward to this week, very much thank you to that harmful H1N1 virus. Curse you~ Please oh please find the cure faster.

Yasmin Ahmad passed away. Al-Fatihah. May you rest in peace. We Malaysians will miss your Petronas ideas very much.

My "tight" schedule could not fit time for me to sit back and blog everything out nowadays. I prefer sleeping than persuading my pitiful eyes to stay awake for me to blog. I still want to live and have kids rather than wasting my time caring for my eyes when I had decided to ruin it to blog my life out. Thank you very much. I went to the Curve on Sunday, Momma had something in mind at Ace Hardware so I just ran along to Borders, my heaven on Earth. There was some book-signing by Xandria Ooh, or whatsoever her name is. Who is she? I have no idea. She's anonymous to my already drama-filled life. I found a new little black dress series book, The Girlfriend Curse. Totally took my attention. Tehee. We went home sooner than I thought, since Momma had bought what she was seeking for.

So, other vicious updates. My favourite part is first in line (of course), that is Syafique~ Tehee. Here's my list for you, Mr. Comel sirre.
1. I like you.
2. I love you.
3. I adore you.
4. I'm crazy over you.
5. I have a crush on you.
6. I am head over heels for you.
7. I am obsessed about you.
8. I am intoxicated by you.
9. I less than three you. I heart you.

There you go. 9, as I had promised you last Friday. :) We had "dates". Tehee. Yeah. I want to call those so-called secret meetings "dates". Guilty? Charge me and arrest me, please. ;D

A secret date (okaaaaaay, not so secret anymore) with Syafique. ;D Heeeeee. He walked me to the train station (which is SUPER sweet) and I could not walk up the stairs because I do not want to part away from him. ;( I eventually did with a heavy heart. *Sighs. I went off to Bandar Tasik Selatan where my cousin, Nabila is waiting. We travelled to KL Sentral together and waited like 40 minutes to finally board the sardinized train. Sheesh. I killed most of my 40 minutes calling up Syafique. ;D I am never content with what I get, especially in his case. I want to talk to him 24/7 if I possible. I bet 24/7 won't still be enough for me. I guess I am addicted to this adorable Syafique. Seriously.

Went out with Nabila to the Curve. I wanted to ask Syafique to tag along but being the shy me, I did not. ;( Nabila kept on pushing me. "Ajak la dia. Ajak la dia." I was darn shy. Besides, he's too far away. *Sighs. So, tak jumpa lah walaupun hati teringin. ;P

Disaster. Tragedy. I was victimized. *Sobs. I told Syafique all about it that night. He was furious because I did not do as he asked me to. Sorry Syafique~ I was scared. ;( At the same time, I was touched! Syafique cares about me. Yippeeeeeeee!

I arrived quite early for LAW 240. Heeeee. Saya ada pemangkin semangat! I sat at the back, alone. Then Syafique arrived. He sat behind me. I pretended to focus on the newspaper in my hands but my heart kept on thumping and screamed "Syafiq kat belakang! HOmigosh, HOmigosh, HOmigosh~" I kept my cool (poyolah) and pretended like nothing happened. Then, Yasmin texted. "Kelas law cancel, tolong sebarkan." Wadafaklah kata hati saya. I woke up super super early and class got cancelled and Yasmin informed me like 20 minutes later and you get the picture, right? So, I "stomped" out the class. Met Syafique outside. Tehee. Then he went to the washroom. I'm like, takkan nak ikut. So I left with a heavy heart. Then, text text text. We met. ;) After that date, he walked me to class. Heeee. I'm like, YAYY ME, the guy I adore much is walking beside me to my class. Thump thump goes my heart. Diffan just grinned at the sight of me grinning. LOL. Then, he left to Level 2. I waited with Diffan when we finally learned that the venue changed to Level 2. Haiyaaa. If only I'd knew that early. Can walk with Syafique a little longer. *Winks. That night, I told him about this guy who texted me, anonymously.

I met him at the library. Dating lagi ni. *Winks. Why la? Everytime my eyes set upon him, my heart just melts. I melt like butter to oil. Tehee. I parked my ass there and just observe him. Comel bangat deyh~ Then, something happened (totally my stupid mistake) and it turned the whole atmosphere around. *Sighs. Sorry Syafique. He walked to me Student Square and left for class. That was not one happy part-away moment. ;| I went for lunch with Shu, back again in Student Square. Texted him. I had not meet him much after our not-so-happy part-away moments until law class. His face was tight and my mood was down. No mood at all. I walked home, alone. (Sedih). He called me that night, we talked about it.

He saw me walking with Adli alone. The reality : there were three of us, Adli, myself and Diffan. We met that evening. I promised to no longer skip classes. My bad. (Kena marah ouh) BUT I promised. So I won't do it anymore. Our meeting spot this time is at Level 3. Tehee. He copied some of my pictures (some, as in 25 pieces!). Tengah bermesra,saya pun merajuk dan lari. ;P Agak mengada la but I had my reasons. Best part? He ran and chased up after me, except that, he went to the wrong direction. *Flattered. I ran down while he ran up. He called up and we met again. So, the hunt for empty space began again. We went up and down tapi tak jumpa. At last, we sat outside. ;) Then, he walked me to the train station, once more. It was incredible for me to have the guy I adore much walking up beside me. Parting ways were always the worst part cause I don't want to part away!

At first, "konon-konon" merajuk. ;P As I walked out of class and walked alone, he called. ;D We met. Heee. Like the rest of the week. ;)) In the middle of sending me to the train station, we sort of date on that bridge. Tehee. Who cares? As long as he's right next to me, any place in the world seems fine.

I woke up late and was really effing not well so I decided to skip the day but I remembered I had to quizzes to attend so I just had to get my butt of my bed and got ready A.S.A.P. Sheesh. Lynn wanted to pick me up at the LRT so I just waited there and then she asked me to walk to some sort of fly-over which was darn scary and creepy but I did anyway. I did not tell him specifically where I was and it made him made. ;( Sorry again. My fault. I should have told you. Later on. MGT class. Class finished off early so we're allowed to leave early. ;D I sat outside the class with Lynn when Adli suddenly approached me. Sheesh Adli. Anyway, I met him soon after than and we went down where another scene with Adli happened. Syafique had received a call from Arif, Adli came out of nowhere and just grinned sheepishly at the sight of me with Syafique. Then, another scene with Arif. I felt very awkward like that. Then, we walked to the train station. ;) Comel tak, jalan sama-sama? ;)) Then Syah called. Huagh. I guess that just spolied his mood. ;((

Wuhhuuu. Isn't that a little bit too much of details? ;P Blueek. I don't care. HOwell.

By the way. I'm going back to hometown tomorrow morning. Momma's driving. Mirol has been suspected of the H1N1 virus and his school : MRSM Kepala Batas has been closed down for a week. I'm worried of his health for god sake let him be alright. ;| I think we'll be back home by tomorrow night, if possible. Who knows? But we'll be home. I might have to quarantine myself too if he's coming home. 7 days right? OHwell. I hope everything turns out okay. *Sighs.

Another thing to say here. I don't wanna lose you to her. Na-ah. When you told me she called you two days in a row, I felt a lump in heart. A massive lump. I'm scared. Seriously. Please don't leave.

Hugs and kisses people.
and not even by an inch of chance will i let anyone steal you from me .

Saturday, July 25, 2009

my heart goes thump thump when you're around .

Sunday, July 19, 2009

you're like a drug for me, is this wrong?

When I'm with you,
eternity is a step away,
my love continues to grow,
with each passing day.

This treasure of love,
I cherish within my soul,
how much I love you...
you'll never really know.

You bring a joy to my heart,
I've never felt before,
with each touch of your hand,
I love you more and more.

Whenever we say goodbye,
whenever we part,
know I hold you dearly,
deep inside my heart.

So these seven words,
I pray you hold true,
"Forever And Always,
I Will Love You."

Saturday, July 18, 2009

and we should let the heart screams.

Saya suka awak.

Saya sayang awak.


Thursday, July 16, 2009

i came apart inside a world made of angry people.

This week has witnessed me blush furiously too much. ;) Waaaay too much. My jaw hurt due to excessive smiling. Tuesday witnessed as a "heart-to-heart" almost 3 hours conversation happened. I slept like a little child with a smile pasted upon my face. It was unexpected. VERY unexpected but I guess I was glad it did. I think I am glad. Mmmmm. Or maybe I am scared. I don't know. I am confused with my own feelings. Takut syok sendiri. ;|

BUT I do enjoy all of our "secret meetings" very very VERY much. Teheeeee. Today's one of the best. Tapi dia "jahat". He snapped my picture. I was looking pretty messed up. ;| Embarrassing much. Secretly, deep down, my heart was thumping wild. Gosh. He's in front of me, very less than 50 meters. Very close. But still far away.

And when I look at you, I go crazy deep down inside. The urge to scream is undeniably high. I wish the time would just stop so that I'd have all the time in the world to cherish when I am around you. Just by having you in the same room could lift up my spirits.

I like you.
I like you.
I like you.

Only you.

Monday, July 13, 2009

why must there be a wall between you and me ? :|
i often mess up the only real chance i suspect i would get .

and i can't help myself from how my heart is racing.

S : 143 is what?
E : I like you kott.
S : Are you sure?
E : Oh, tak boleh eyh? Ok. Tarik balik.
S : Why nak tarik balik? And what if "like" tukar jadi "love"? Ha.
E : Nak tukar? Tukar lah.
S : If tukar, tak kisah ke?
E : Tak.

but at least i got the courage to admit the crime.

Monday equals to awkward day. HAHA.

I hate my schedule, especially Mondays. ;| I have a 4-hour gap in between. Worse. I waited 4 darned hours and that class got canceled. I roared at Aliaa and Afiq. Pity them. Frustrated. Four hours for nothing. Like, duuuuuuuh. I could have go home and rest. My emotions are not in their best conditions.

Alas and alack. The waiting was just excruating. I had lunch with Dyla, Mira and Wida (...notice how their name sounds so much alike...) and sat with them later on. Was very sleepy. ;| Stomach full, afternoon. Yeah. Sleepy.

I tagged along with Dyla to Komasa and when I got back to the lower level, bam! Shocked. Speechless. What is he doing there? I went from sleepy to fresh. LOL. I barely sit when Adli called out for me. When I got back to my seat, Aswad insisted me to follow him for lunch. AGAIN? Oh no. I did not eat lunch. ;P I am not willing to look at myself every morning with flabby fats. I'd cry. ;(

So, I followed Aswad and Fara and sat like a quiet little girl while they both chit chat about Saka and whatsoever. I'm too "city-minded" to actually understand. ;| Good thing I was texting someone. At least the boredom I experienced was reduced by 50%. LOL. After he enjoyed his lunch, we hang around in one of those small little consultation rooms. Both of them sang to songs I do not know. Then this happened after Aswad hung up his phone.

Fara : Awek ke Aswad? Budak mana?
Aswad : A'ah. Alah. Budak sini jugak.
(Then I forgot what they talked about as I was busy texting *winks*)
Fara : Ooooh. Dia tahu tak kau rapat dengan Lisa?
Aswad : Tau. Tau je.
Fara : Nik dulu tahu?
Aswad : Nik pun tahu. Aku, budak ni, semua dia tahu. Apa yang aku ada, semua dia ada. Ok. Kecuali badan aku la.
(We roar in laughters)
Aswad : Tapi Lisa dia tak boleh terima Syuk ni. Nik dia boleh terima lagi.
(Ini lah saat saya membuat muke mengejek sebab girlfriend dia sekarang tak lawa.)
Lisa : Dah tu. Orang cari la yang lawa sikit. Ni tak. Eeee. Tolong la.
Aswad : Kau senang la nak cakap. Kau lain.
(Entah, tak paham.)
Aswad : Lisa ni pun, aku pernah keneng-keneng kan. Siap menjadi tuuu. Sayang je.
(Saya menjadi emo di saat ini.)
Lisa : Tu la pasal. Jadi gila kan. Heh.
Fara : Oh, siapa?
Aswad : Arwah ........
Fara : ........
Lisa : Mmmmmm.

Wah. I got mentally emotional that moment. ;( Too many frustrations. Sheeeesh.

Basically, I am very emotional today.

Sunday, July 12, 2009

i wasn't looking for nobody when you looked my way.

Hati kata saya mahu. Hati kata ya.
Namun hati bicara, usahlah pentingkan diri.
Jangan memperlekehkan hati insan yang lain.
Biar kita sedih asalkan mereka gumbira.

Hati kata saya mahu. Hati kata ya.
Tapi hati takut orang lain terasa.
Hati tak sanggup.
Hati pasti luka memandang wajah hampa yang lain.

Hati kata saya mahu. Hati kata ya.
Hati gusar. Hati risau.
Jika ini hanya bertepuk sebelah, hati pasti sedih.
Hati takut.

Hati kata saya mahu. Hati kata ya.

apahal jiwang senja - senja ni? dah la pakai bahasa ibunda. tolong. lisa dah gila. ;|

Saturday, July 11, 2009

don't wait for the hands of time to second guess and change your mind.

My schedule literally killed me last week. I come home exhausted, every single day, having little amount of energy for the rest of the day. Classes are waaaaay too crowded and this is a bad sign. How am I suppose to focus with a lot of people around? HOmigosh. I need to stay focus. HELP.
This is one of Aza's "ceramah" I received through the phone. ;P
Aza : Cha, kalau you fikir hati you dulu boleh tak? Ni tau nak jaga hati orang lain je.
Lisa : Eleyh. Cakap orang, you pun sama. Heee.
Aza : Sebab I dah la I takmau you guys kena jugak. I fikir sangat si _____ tu baru I fikir myself so I dapat macam ni. I deserve la kott apa yang I dapat ni.

Aza's been trying to tell me not to over-cared about others and neglect my own precious fragile feelings fully. Too bad I'm not good in that department. I'm afraid that I would hurt others if I start caring about myself. *SIGHS.

My birthday went quite smoothly. Thanks to everyone who wished me, I appreciated it much. Aswad made a it quite a gushy moment when he told almost everyone he met. He even sang for me. :) Thanks Ina for your lovely post. *Flattered. Plus, I got chocolates from two people. :D I literally went to JB after a 4-hours drive that night. LOL. That sort of "journey" happened like, once in a blue moon and gosh, best lah! Seriously. :P

Monday was awkward. I had to pretend it was nothing.
No classes on Tuesday.
Almost bumped on each other on Wednesday.
Thursday, shocked perhaps?
Friday. LOL.
Saturday : moody all day long.
AND I woke up this morning with a huge grin after reading that text. :)

By the way, I am trying to lessen up my texting habit. I have to control my obsessions over my handphone as I need to struggle and push myself. Won't be going online as much too. >.< Sorry if too busy for you, okay? :)
and the hopes of you i held within flew off the roof .

and he said :

e***a a**a
"i adore you a little more than yesterday".

i am the cause.
The starter.
The person who create One of the most emotional day, for U. :|
Your crying and sobbing "maker" :(
I'd like to apologize to U *Both of u, actually.
Sorry for what I've done.

Nice to know U dear. Gonna miss your smile, laugh, & call your name repeatedly.

happy birthday

don't let me be the last to know.

My friends say you're so into me
And that you need me desperately
They say you say we're so complete

But I need to hear it straight from you
If you want me to believe it's true
I've been waiting for so long it hurts
I wanna hear you say the words, please

Don't, don't let me be the last to know
Don't hold back, just let it go
I need to hear you say
You need me all the way
Oh, if you love me so
Don't let me be the last to know

Your body language says so much
Yeah, I feel it in the way you touch
But til' you say the words it's not enough
C'mon and tell me you're in love, please

C'mon baby, c'mon darling, ooh yeah
C'mon, let me be the one
C'mon now, oh yeah

I need to hear you say
You love me all the way
And I don't wanna wait another day
I wanna feel the way you feel
Oh, c'mon

Don't, just let me be the one
Don't hold back, just let it go
I need to hear you say
You need me all the way
So…baby, if you love me
Don't let me be the last to know

Singer : Britney Spears.
Title : Don't Let Me Be The Last To Know.
Album : Oops! I Did It Again.

Tuesday, July 7, 2009

what my birth day says about me.

Your Life
You often have problem in promoting yourself, just because you don't know how to express your true self. On the other hand, you don't really care what they think. This is why people misunderstand you until they really get a chance to learn about your pleasant personality. Opposite sex find you mysterious and worth searching. Your wit is remarkable but sometimes you are too fast to follow.

Your Love
You won't reveal your feeling even after dreaming about the same guy over and over. Your first love lasts forever. You are responsible to the feeling of your lover. The chance to betray your lover is none. You have luck with children.

Your birth on the 9th day of the month adds a tone of idealism and humanitarianism to your nature. You become one who can work easily with people because you are broadminded, tolerant and generous. You are ever sensitive to others needs and feelings, and even if the other numbers in your core makeup don't show it, you are very sympathetic and compassionate. Your feeling run deep and you often find yourself in dramatically charged situations. This 9 energy always tends to give more that it gets.

what my birth month says about me.

JulyFun to be with
Difficult to fathom and to be understood
Quiet unless excited or tensed
Takes pride in oneself
Has reputation
Easily consoled
Concerned about people's feelings
Temperamental and unpredictable
Moody and easily hurt
Witty and sparkly
Not revengeful
Forgiving but never forgets
Dislikes nonsensical and unnecessary things
Guides others physically and mentally
Sensitive and forms impressions carefully
Caring and loving
Treats others equally
Strong sense of sympathy
Wary and sharp
Judges people through observations
No difficulties in studying
Loves to be alone
Always broods about the past and the old friends
Likes to be quiet
Homely person
Waits for friends
Never looks for friends
Not aggressive unless provoked
Prone to having stomach and dieting problems
Loves to be loved
Easily hurt but takes long to recover

jeez, you made my days.

1) awkward situation day.
Just plain awkward. No elaboration needed. :)

2) date jumbling day + covering up embarrassment day.
You know who you are *Evil laughs*

3) tiring day for me.
I almost missed Batu 3 station if it weren't for one phone call. Like, that much close. Thanks? :P

1) boring.
2) lone ranger on the hunt.
3) lame.

Lets see what Wednesday, Thursday and Friday have for me. ^^, By the way, I'll be updating lesser than always. I am predicting my too tight schedule will tire me every single day. *Sighs.

Sunday, July 5, 2009

so if your world should fall apart, call me i'll run to where you are.

Aza was right! Princess Protection Program rocks with a capital R. :D

I love love love love it. Its about two totally different girls - an all American girl and a true princess - and their worlds "collide" and became best friends. :) Aza claims herself as that all American girl because she says she's harsher compare to myself. Tehee. I'm the princess. (Ini bukan perasan ye.)

Friendship is truly the best treasure in the world.
I love you Aza!

princess protection program.

Demi Lovato and Selena Gomez

Official Summary.
Teenager Carter Mason and her dad Joe are getting along just fine, living an unassuming life in Lake Monroe, Louisiana -- until the day Joe decides to bring his work home with him. Joe is a covert agent in the international Princess Protection Program, and when he saves one Rosalinda Marie Montoya Fiore, the soon-to-be teenage monarch of the tiny country of Costa Luna, he is charged with watching over her until things in her country are stable again. An evil dictator, General Kane, and his army are trying to take over the tiny country and throw Rosalinda and her mother in a cell.
The last thing that Carter wants to do is share her room, and her life, with a snooty princess who thinks she's better than everyone else. Between the mean girls at school and the guy who doesn't notice her, Carter has enough to deal with already. As she reluctantly "helps" Rosie try to fit in, however, she realizes that although the princess is grossly out of her element, there is more to her than Carter could ever have imagined. The two are able to find some common ground despite the opposite worlds they come from, and Carter begins to understand that this princess might actually be worth protecting.

sometimes i wish i could save you.

Today is the day. Sunday the 5th.

The last time a Sunday falls on a 5th was 3 months back. 5th April '09 ; Sunday. The day I will never forget for the rest of my life. Never. Thinkin back, hell yeah, it has been 3 months since it happened. Since my dear friend left us all. He had been caught in an accident where he sort of flew out the car and his skull cracked. There was nothing anyone could do.

3 months and not a day pass by without me missing him. I remember that faithful morning. Yusri had called me using an anonymous number around 7 a.m. I was asleep and when I reached out to answer the phone, it was too late. He text messaged me. The text that changed everything. I became speechless and could not believe my eyes.

" Aslmkm. Al-Fatihah buat mber kte Syed Adib yg tlah plang ke rhmatllah akbat kmlangan jlanrya pgi td. Smha rohny dcucuri rhmat. Amin.. "

I thought he was joking. I wasn't ready! I asked him to call me back and when he did, he was speechless. He could not say a word. At that point, my tears drop silently. How could this be? I hung up without a word. I hugged my knees. Cried silently. Sobbed. I recite Al-Fatihah. I need to talk to someone so I decided to call Sadiq, my ex-boyfriend who once had an argument with late Adib. I told him then, crying, sobbing. He became speechless. No one predicted this.

I called Aswad next. Aswad made me tell him three times because he too, could not believe it. I hung up and cried with all my heart. Flashes of memories ran through my mind. How could this be? He called me a few days back. We were laughing, joking. We texted. He asked me out. :(

I went gloomy, the whole day. I spoke little and sat in the bathroom for a loooong time. I think the whole family noticed the glominess. I tried not to cry but ... *Sighs. I remember sitting in my room, reciting Al-Fatihah and read Yasin, fighting back tears. Fahmi called to check up. He told me to be strong. To let go. Hakimi also called. Eriene called later in the evening.

I told Momma all about it and she let me have my alone time. I fought tears throughout the day. I did not go to his place for I am afraid I could not be strong enough to face everything.

To make my day better, Momma decided to bring us out. She insisted. I followed eventually. Of course, there is no way I'm going to cry in public. That's just humiliating. :( I went to Borders and found One More Day by Mitch Albom. That just saddens me up.

One More Day book review :
For One More Day starts with a young sports reporter approaching former baseball player Chick Benetto. Chick's first words are, "Let me guess. You want to know why I tried to kill myself." From there the story of Chick's life is told in his voice, and the reader hears it as if he or she is the sports reporter sitting there listening to him.
When Chick tries to commit suicide, he wakes up in a world between life and death where he gets to spend one more day with his mother, who dies 8 years earlier. Chick was supposed to be with his mother the day she died, and he still harbors guilt over the fact that he wasn't.
The story moves back and forth between memories of Chick's childhood and adolescence, and the action taking place between Chick and his dead mother. Ultimately, it is a story of redemption and making peace with one's past. It is a story of love, family, mistakes and forgiveness.


The next day (6th April '09, Monday) I decided to wear my dark blue Baju Kurung because we used to match our attires. I met Aswad, opting the same shade with mine. I just sat next to him and the tears streamed down again. He just let me. Nik and Adli came and as he told them the breaking news, I cried more. Ohmigosh, I thought. How will this day go on?

Fahmi texted later on, asking me if I would join him for lunch. I agreed because I haven't ate anything. We talked and chatted about late Adib. It felt weird. I wished I would not have to use past tenses when talking about him.

As I walked to the train station that evening, the tears built up again. I remembered when he used to walk me to the station. Gosh. How could this be? I bet I looked really ugly, walking alone, fighting back tears. I called Aliaa, so that I have someone to talk to. No, she's not the one. I called Aza instead. :(

I will remember you. Always. Forever. May you rest in peace.

Saturday, July 4, 2009

sing along maybe once maybe twice, let's try it together.

click it for larger view.

Highlight of the post : That wide GRIN. :D

I have censored my own wide grin because my grin is not as cute wide as the one on top. LOL. And those little chatty thing there pun kena censored. PLUS, this is what happened when I sat in front of the laptop at 2:30 am.

PS : Jangan marah! *Evil laughs.

looks like i'm into divinity only when i can see its sweet, sweet rays.

Perhaps my mood is easily intrigued nowadays. I'd get pissed off easily. I mean, waaaay easy. That is so not me. You'd say one word that felt wrong and bam!, I'd explode inside. I wonder why. PMS perhaps? No idea.
I might say, I want to be alone. For now. For the weekends. I'm not sure why but I'm not feeling okay at all. I'm pissed off for an unknown reason. I don't want to talk about it because I don't know what it is. Seriously.

Sheesh. I need help?

WAIT! No. I am not mentally sick. I guess I'm just too tired and my schedules will kill me, literally. I'd die inside. Wish me luck people. I need some luck right now.

HOmigosh. Whatthefuck is wrong with me?

ps : I am seeking for help, anyone? Aza? :|

how to stay young.

1. Throw out nonessential numbers. This includes age, weight and height. Let the doctors worry about them. That is why you pay 'them.'

2. Keep only cheerful friends. The grouches pull you down.

3. Keep learning. Learn more about the computer, crafts, gardening, whatever. Never let the brain idle. 'An idle mind is the devil's workshop.' And the devil's name is Alzheimer.

4. Enjoy the simple things.

5. Laugh often, long and loud. Laugh until you gasp for breath.

6. The tears happen. Endure, grieve, and move on. The only person, who is with us our entire life, is ourselves. Be ALIVE while you are alive.

7. Surround yourself with what you love, whether it's family, pets, keepsakes, music, plants, hobbies, whatever. Your home is your refuge.

8. Cherish your health : If it is good, preserve it. If it is unstable, improve it. If it is beyond what you can improve, get help.

9. Don't take guilt trips. Take a trip to the mall, even to the next county ; to a foreign country but NOT to where the guilt is.

Friday, July 3, 2009

change, like secrets in the wind i hear the whispers madame butterfly.

So, today went as bad as anyone can imagine. >.< Bad hair day, bad shoe day, bad time day, bad mood day. You name it. I got up really early. I ate breakfast. I told Momma, I wanna leave at 9 a.m. I got ready and by 9 I was ready to go. But no one would want to sent me. I waited for an hour. Wan sent me to Batu Tiga station. 5 minutes away and I saw the train pass by! Ohmigosh! I waited for 20 minutes for the next one. My shoes squashed. :( Both of them. Stupid shoes. I ran to Sogo and bought myself new ones. I am already late. Dyla kept calling. Abah kept calling. I missed the train, again. :( I finally arrived. Back gate, closed. Shit. I had to walk, almost all the way round to that new stupid gate. I arrived, registeration will be continued after Friday Prayers. Sheesh. My hair, everything in a mess. I was sweating. Bad bad day! I was tired. I followed Dyla to print out her Pre Registeration Subject. Then, pass through Cafeteria. I looked up, ha, he was smiling at me. :) I was pretty messed up so I have no idea whether I smiled back or not. Sheessh. I wished I was invincible. He smiled grinned and I shrieked at Dyla. She was like "Okaaaaaaaaaay. Relax la." LOL. First good thing that actually happened today. :P Gedik gedik.

Later on, Dyla and myself belasah through registeration. We went up and checked our schedules. Yayy! Mostly with Dyla, at least I'd have a friend. Dyla went out. I stayed. I had nothing to do so I went and searched for his schedule. ROTF. Got same class! ;P Gedik gedik.

My green Kebaya got some compliments. ;)) Second best thing that happened from one single individual. >.< HOyeah. My schedules killed me. Literally. My jaws dropped at the sight of it. Kill me now, kill me. :D

Thursday, July 2, 2009

it is hard to forget when there is such an empty space since you left .

the little wish list. :P

Here's a bigger, pictorial list to that tiny little wish list there. :))

My birthday is coming up. HAHA. Jeez. Maaaaaaaaaan, I'm getting fatter older. Its unlike me to build up a wish list but it seems fun and I am currently enjoying leisure time, alone. :D I know there are no possibilities in getting any of these but hey, a girl is allowed to dream and I'm having so much fun posting this list. Enjoy! ;)

1) Tons of books.
Can anyone just build me a huge library with never ending number of books in it?

2) Lots and lots of pretty summer dresses.
My gosh. See, how cute that is?
I want this one. Waaaaaaaa. Very flirty. >.< Shirtdress~!!!
Grrrr. I am venting. I love this one.
Going green in hotness. :)
This will infatuate my features. :P
One shoulder dress, please, please?
Classic pattern.

3) Pink Sony Walkman : NWZ-W202 / NWZ-E436F / NWZ-A828.
Pretty please? :)



4) Boxes of After Eight chocolates.

:9 Yummy. Please please.

5) O2 Atom Life.
I've seen it. I've hold it. I've played with it. I've used it. I fell in love with it.
Momma, can I please keep it? ;)

6) Room Makeover.
Like this! ;D

7) V and Identified.

8) New boyfriend perhaps?

9) Suprises!

Wednesday, July 1, 2009

i'm always a flop at a top-notch affair, but i've still got my health, so what do i care?

Can anyone buy me this? Comel la ada bakul. :P

A short tale of two best friends talking on the phone. ;)

Aza : Oit. Tadi pergi mana?
Lisa : Tadi Lisa berbasikal la. Driving. Lisa drive basikal.
Aza : Apa dia?
Lisa : Lisa naik basikal la tadi.
Aza : Waaaaa. Lisa isteri mithali seyh.
Lisa : *Confused. Ha? Apa kena mengena?
Aza : Ye la, Lisa goreng ikan.
Lisa : Ahaha. Lisa cakap Lisa naik basikal, bukan goreng ikan!
Aza : Ohhh. Aaaaaaaaaa.
Lisa : Ahahah. Aza pekak.
Aza : Waaa. Lisa jahat.

LOL. Aza, Aza. :P But I still love you. Muah muah.

Anyways. I went cycling today. Heee. For the first thirty minutes, I carried Elle around but she's too heavy that I sent her home. :P I went out again, alone and cycle. Boy, I am so tired! Its been a while since I last cycled and now I'm sure I ain't that fit anymore. Tehee.

spread your wings, flyin over frozen mountains, crystal rivers and geyser fountains.

Venue : My room.
In the middle of the night. ;)

Nabila : Lisa, kami nak tengok phone boleh?
Lisa : Nah. Tengok la. Takde apa pun. Meh phone Nabila.
Nabila : Eh. Eh. Lisaaaaa. Siapa ni?

(She flashed me a photo from a personalized private folder. =.=')

Lisa : Oh. Itu nama dia _____. Heee.
Nabila : Kawan eyh?
Lisa : A'ah. :) Kawaaaaaaaaaan.
Nabila : Eh. Apesal gambar dia yang ni tembam ha?
Lisa : Mana, mana? Oh, yang tu. Tau takpe. Heeee. Tembam kan?
Nabila : Gambar dia yang lain okay je tapi yang ni tembam la.
Lisa : Lisa tau. Bila Lisa cakap kat dia yang dia tembam, dia marah pulak. Mengada je. Hehe.
Nabila : Dia salah tangkap kott gambar ni. Ahah. Macam comel je kan?
Lisa : Ahah. Tau takpe. ;))

:P I'm not telling who ______ is. LOL. You know who you are. *Evil laughs.

i know some might say, that i'm wasting time.

Venue : The kitchen.

It all happened yesterday evening. Momma was cooking Soto Daging. Nabila and myself sat facing each other at the breakfast bar, cleaning up taugeh. LOL.

Lisa : Mom, can I not eat?
Momma : *Made faces. Up to you. (Pauses) But I thought you like tulang.

(Momma disappeared to the back of the kitchen.)

Nabila : Kenapa takmau makan? Diet ke? Lisa diet.
Lisa : *Whispers. Dah gemuk. Nanti pergi kelas takda baju.
Nabila : Gemok? Keding je. Tulang je. Nabila macam ni pun malas nak diet.
Lisa : *Grins.
Momma : (Suddenly reappears) Lisa dah gemok. Kena diet.
Lisa : Heee. Tengok. Mama pun cakap.
Nabila : Dak eh. Berat Lisa berapa?
Lisa : *Whispers. 47 . Hehe.
Nabila : Ceh. Ingat 50++. Sama je dengan Along. Along pun 47 . Okay la tu.
Lisa : Mama kata tak. *Laughs.

At last, I ate dinner. ;D This morning I checked up on my weight and I am 1 kg lighter. Yippee~ So right now I am 46 kgs. Jeeeez. Gold weight = 40 kgs perhaps? :P
if I could wish one thing , i'd hear you call my name .

nur azalina suzianti ♥

Happy birthday my best friend,
Amazing times, we always spend.
Laughter and jokes are common place,
Since we built that solid base.

Special friend that I hold dear,
Always wish to have you near.
We get along, like bread with honey,
A friendship worth, much more than money.

If you stumble, count me there,
Gratitude; no need to declare.
Your thoughts are clear, in my mind,
Understanding we always find.

Happy birthday my best friend,
I’m excited to attend.
This birthday poem, is just for you,
A great big smile is overdue.

Nur Azalina Suzianti ♥

A very happy birthday to you sayang. I love you so much lah.
As I said, you're getting older. You are already nineteen.
I am still eighteen. :P I love you!

By the way, I know, you will always be there for me as much as I will for you. ;)

PS : Do you remember that picture? :)) Good times baby, good times.